Midnight Call

Such excitement and nervous anticipation

for my first time providing nursing assistance

during the night shift.

Right as I clock in,

the surgical ward is bustling 

with nurses and doctors

completing their rounds.

Now, as I catch my breath,

the hectic ward slowly winds down.

As I am surrounded 

with a sense of calmness,

a sudden

Ding, Ding, Ding

grabs my attention to

a nearby patient’s call bell. 

A wide-eyed elderly patient

whose dark blue eyes seem to 

tell the story of a captivating life,

requests to make a phone call to her husband.

Surprisingly, her request is denied.

They say it’s too late 

To call call her to husband now, 

and that she can just 

wait to see him in the morning. 

As I notice the patient seems to be 

filled with trepidation,

I attempt to speak, 

but nothing comes out.

Instead,

racing thoughts impede my mind.

It’s just one call.

The nurse is in charge.

I am just a nursing assistant. 

They know best.

Right?

But the morning never comes for the patient.

She coded 

shortly after her request that evening.

Dread, shame and regret

takes over as I am stunned with

the realization of my failure to advocate 

for one simple request.

A midnight call that never happened

because it was deemed unnecessary.

When the patient’s husband arrives

he looks directly towards

the night shift team and asks

“Why didn’t she call? She told me she would call if something felt off.”

………..